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Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Ohyay. Here are two choices for you. Choose one and one only.
1. Stay and read this totally rubbish post and think that I am an idiot
2. Scram and maintain what you think of me





I know I really shouldn't be lamenting about my math test. Okay, I admit. I am a perfectionist. Don't know how to do the question nevermind, but if I make a careless mistake, I would sulk about it long enough to make you annoyed and even pissed at me. GRARRH. But I am not upset about me not getting what I wanted for my math test. I am pissed at myself for complaining about my math test when I clearly and very well know that my grade is better than some people from other classes. >< I feel really really bad about feeling sad about my math test. Okay, am I making sense? lol. I bet I don't.

There's another thing to the math test. Expectation. Not from me. I could see that disappointment in your eyes. It's making me feel so small. Don't. Please don't. I see you staring at the script with that frown. I see you asking me what's wrong, trying to hide what you feel. I watch you as you set the pen on the paper to sign. It was such a simple process. But it took so long. (Why. I want to know why.) You turn away and walk into the room, flick on the tv and sit there, watching a comedy.

Whatever. I cannot be bothered anymore. I wanna run. Sprint. WHATEVER. I WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE. I feel like I am nothing. Yeah nothing. There's much more to this than you think there is. It's not just math. It's everything that's in this stupid life of mine. What shit.

adios

9:11 PM