my dad's playing deep purple on the stereo, and it's really really hard metal rock.
it's woman from tokyo now. dad is imitating the uh scream. so it's kind of 0.o.

anyway. today's been rather boring.
tomorrow's my last day of work and payday, so YAYYERS for me!
sadly, there isn't going to be any party because of the lack of response, blehhhhh.
so i guess it's stay at home and lie in bed and count down slowly and then send out the pre-typed sms-es to People Who Matter.
that's sad, because i can't get drunk like that. ahhhh.
and the saddest thing of all is i don't get to YELLLLLLL HAPPY NEW YEAR drunkenly like i was planning to.
ahwell, next year then. next year i'm planning to get mum to do the christmas party, ho.
and new year party as well, if she's willing. HOHOHO.
i miss those years, ahhh.

2007 in less than 30 hours. it's shocking.
the earth has revolved around the sun... ONCE.
hahaha. well almost. HEH. =)
back to the same spot we were a year ago! lol.

i'm glad things, both good and bad, happened this year.
i changed, a lot.
i went back to read my january and february posts, and i just cannot believe i actually thought that way.
it was stupid, at some points in time. but there were some parts where i was so hopeful.
if there's one thing i don't like about myself, it is being overly hopeful and ending up disappointed when things just don't happen the way i thought it would.
like jamie cullum sings,
the past is gone the flames are out from fires that have burned.
new ideals and different thoughts from lessons i have learned.

i'll never repeat the same mistakes.
like being overly academically one-track minded, and pissing some people off.
like expecting so much for myself and trying so hard to make my parents say that i've done well, that i lose .. everything.
like expecting too much and being so idealistic in (mainly) relationships when it's stupid to and get all clingy and moody at the end. because what goes up must come down (it just depends when. some take a delightfully long time, giving me a couple more months of heavenly bliss. some just months.).
like caring so much for one person, i forget about my other friends.
like saying i'll do it and end up being a procrastinating dumbass (this has to go, if i am to be a good vchair and a responsible games capt next year).
like not seeing the good things and only the bad things.
like forgetting about caring for other people, when i get into the mood to be sulky and basically very mean.
like being such a weird person. i am rather weird, haha. i think of the weirdest things in my mind. like whether a person jumping off a building would die before he or she hits the ground. like if the drains will lead to a crocodile infested secret lakes. like whether people will miss me if i'm gone forever. see? weird right? so if you see me stoning, i'm probably thinking about these weird things.
like being a leader who can't make good decisions.
like backing into my safe shell of security during a discussion by not making a comment, when i know if i tried, i have loads to contribute.

that's enough of mistakes.
2007, i'll do things better, and avoid these things.
but 2006 was memorable.
my first foray into leadership.
my first try at being more social (i swear i was a self-proclaimed anti-social nerd who loved the beatles more than maroon 5, preferred the company of my computer to human contact and an assortment of other weird characteristics, like SINGING AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE IN THE SHOWER, in tune sometimes for songs i know very well and OFFKEY for those that i randomly remember).
my first time actually being happy about GOING to school EVERY DAY - because of the people, and because of the things i get to try and do.
my first time feeling purposeful in life, not just grades and more grades. (frs is one thing. i took it very very very seriously and worked on the robot hard, though i was a noobcake. shuting actually said i am good enough to take over her place as builder, lol.)
my first time overseas on my own! with new friends. =) UK WAS BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG FUN. though i wished i wasn't that moody and emo and all. and that i talked to more people THEN and got to know people from the other groups better THEN, like mmmm kaiyin, the girl who looks like paddington and is in red cross (OMG, I CAN'T REMEMBER HER NAME!), oce, alyssa, charlotte, pei(something, oh no.) and a couple of the other people.
my first real good best friend since josselyn lee in p4. i miss those times, i do. but i can't change it anymore. what happened happened and could never have happened in another way. then again, it is good it happened. i don't believe in best friends, not anymore. best friends forever is a forgotten phrase, erased from my dictionary. because manda and i, in one of our rationalising chats, decided that forever is effing bullcrap. it's rare. it's idealistic. it's stupid. so we've decided, we'll be friends for as long as possible.
my first time being good friends with somebody from another class. it is fun, seeing things from a different POV and listening to different kinds of music, ho. =) and frankly speaking, i never was into the arts stuff at first. but after math changed my mind. and going to error carried forward by the sec 4 people too. i think i'm going for next year's LD production.
my first time getting vday prezzies, HAHA. laugh all you want, hrrrmph. my first two years in rg were ... uneventful, even on vday or my bday. LOL.

many firsts, yes. which is GOOD.

=) sigh. i have to bid this nice year goodbye.
2007 will be better! i'm not being overly hopeful.
it will. though piano is going to be a tarnish on this otherwise to-be good year.
AHH. no negative thoughts.
dang, i'm contradicting myself horribly. =.=
anyhow. 2007, here i come.
9:13 PM